It is really hard to argue against maxing out the 401k or 403b. You are basically getting free money.
OT. Anyone fight with spouse about money?
- Thread starter RedBaloneyPony
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My simple view of money is every dollar you spend needs a $1.40 earned. Taxes etc. So every place you don't spend a buck you saved 40 cents. Hell of a return. Deferred gratification but never easy. jmo
It's a load to put 30k in the 401k by may, along with all the other household expenses. Worked a good amount of double time.
Always max the HSA ALWAYS.
I don't know about all of you but the more I make it seems like the more bills I end up having.
The best was when I had roommates. I will tell everyone I can...when you buy your first house, have some friends live with you at first, charge them some rent and enjoy.
Life is sooo much different at 35 then it was at 25 for me. 10 years ago I wasn’t paying life insurance policies nor did I have the home I have now that let’s face it, homes are expensive to maintain and I am a prideful person who takes care of stuff. I’m thrifty but I don’t cut corners. But yes, life has become more costly as I have aged.
The younger generations really have become dysfunctional. Historically, adolescence, meant pre-adulthood, as in you were ready to take on some responsibility by your early 20s. Now, adolescence means prolonged childhood. You have a massive amount of jackassery among people heading into the 30s. Both the men and women are in prioritizing fun to their own detriment. They wonder why they are so unhappy.
A woman over the age of 30 has less than 50% chance of having a child.
A woman over the age of 30 has less than 50% chance of having a child.
I thank God I was “used” multiple times over then, or I guess I’d be an even bigger mess.
Not proud of plenty of them, but I certainly don’t regret any of them either.
They are all nice and thin on the chalkboard the next day.
Dude, owning a home is a pain in the ass. I miss my apartment lifestyle at times. Awesome pool, weight room, no maintenance issues.
In the last calendar year I have probably spend close to 3k on fixing up or replacing things in my house.
I agree. One thing that I’m personally struggling with is, we have 2 kids now and we’ve talked about trying for a 3rd. We both are on the same page that given our age, 35, our financial capacity to bring on another might be limited if we want to maintain our simple lifestyle. We probably won’t but I hope we don’t regret not having more kids. I hate putting finances as a reason not to have more kids but it is a major concern for me.
My only saving grace is I’m a handy guy and do all of my own work. Added onto my home a few years ago, sitting on some decent equity but it’s not like that helps me much paying 1400 a month on daycare!
Dude as I am sure you remember, when it comes to kids, the best part about them is making them (RIP Rodney Dangerfield)
But...ages 0-4 is brutal. The money, that really won't be an issue and in the end it is probably just a few extra dollars here and there. But the work that you put in from 0-4 is insane.
And it might be more added stress to a situation that sounds annoying.
I am not handy at all, I am pretty much not even close to being a "real man"!
Oh yeah, the old daycare bill! That is a fun one!!
Daycare is an absolute beast of expense. Though I feel like when it went away that money I thought I would save got sucked up into other extracurricular activities as they got older. Key point - don’t expect to save any of that daycare money and don’t look forward to a windfall when they get out😂
Yes
Everyone fights about money.
In omaha...
- If you are poor anything that is spent out of the budget could be devastating so any splurge could cause for an argument. It actually is probably the class that pulls through out of the 3
- If you are middle class and able to afford a house in the suburbs, a nice 2,500 square ft brick one in the city or a condo downtown between 300-500k. You will still argue, because shit happens and you aren't rich. You may have a budget but you don't quite make enough to just spend on things you want whenever you want.
That means when the mid life crisis comes and the man of the house wants a Harley wife is gonna get annoyed and think you are wasting your money. It also means when middle life crisis comes and wife wants to go to Naples and do a wine tour with all of her girl friends once a month. Hubby is going to get a little irritated with all the spending and at some point blow. Then the wife wants a divorce, because her other girlfriends don't have to deal with the budget bull shit.
Then you both sit down and listen to Dave Ramsey who says stop living your life and tackle your bills. Then live your life and become a millionaire. The man makes a great deal of sense, but I can tell you first hand the (Can't do shit) will take it's toll on you about 3 months in when
A. All your buddies are taking a trip to the Husker game, and you can't cause you're on baby step 3
B. All your girlfriends are going on a trip to Florida/Cali for a girls trip and you can't because you just sold your car to have a $1,000 emergency fund.
All I got to say is life and money are the biggest argument tool in every marriage, it ain't just you.
- You're loaded and have multi millions of dollars. Your wife or husband married you for your money and they are going out of home to have sex with someone younger and more sexy because they have money. The emotional connection isn't there, because the marriage was built off of money.
- Last but not least the "I'm rich and I married my beautiful wife or husband when I poor. We fell in love before we were rich." marriage. The perfect marriage right? Well unfortunately this fairytale has it's own financial hardships. What else is out there? Did I get into this marriage to young? Hunny I want to see what Florida is like? Florida is Trumpville and I want to live in a more progressive state like California! I'm not living with all those libtards in Cali!
Why not buy one in both we have the money?
Why are you never with me when I want to go to our Florida house? Well why aren't you with me when I am at our California house? We should just visit this places like I said to begin with.
There are fights over Financial decisions in every relationship. If you say you don't you're giant F***ING liar!
Everyone fights about money.
In omaha...
- If you are poor anything that is spent out of the budget could be devastating so any splurge could cause for an argument. It actually is probably the class that pulls through out of the 3
- If you are middle class and able to afford a house in the suburbs, a nice 2,500 square ft brick one in the city or a condo downtown between 300-500k. You will still argue, because shit happens and you aren't rich. You may have a budget but you don't quite make enough to just spend on things you want whenever you want.
That means when the mid life crisis comes and the man of the house wants a Harley wife is gonna get annoyed and think you are wasting your money. It also means when middle life crisis comes and wife wants to go to Naples and do a wine tour with all of her girl friends once a month. Hubby is going to get a little irritated with all the spending and at some point blow. Then the wife wants a divorce, because her other girlfriends don't have to deal with the budget bull shit.
Then you both sit down and listen to Dave Ramsey who says stop living your life and tackle your bills. Then live your life and become a millionaire. The man makes a great deal of sense, but I can tell you first hand the (Can't do shit) will take it's toll on you about 3 months in when
A. All your buddies are taking a trip to the Husker game, and you can't cause you're on baby step 3
B. All your girlfriends are going on a trip to Florida/Cali for a girls trip and you can't because you just sold your car to have a $1,000 emergency fund.
All I got to say is life and money are the biggest argument tool in every marriage, it ain't just you.
- You're loaded and have multi millions of dollars. Your wife or husband married you for your money and they are going out of home to have sex with someone younger and more sexy because they have money. The emotional connection isn't there, because the marriage was built off of money.
- Last but not least the "I'm rich and I married my beautiful wife or husband when I poor. We fell in love before we were rich." marriage. The perfect marriage right? Well unfortunately this fairytale has it's own financial hardships. What else is out there? Did I get into this marriage to young? Hunny I want to see what Florida is like? Florida is Trumpville and I want to live in a more progressive state like California! I'm not living with all those libtards in Cali!
Why not buy one in both we have the money?
Why are you never with me when I want to go to our Florida house? Well why aren't you with me when I am at our California house? We should just visit this places like I said to begin with.
There are fights over Financial decisions in every relationship. If you say you don't you're giant F***ING liar!
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No dude - when you are both on the same page with money there are not fights. I’ve not had one single fight with my wife about money … ever. We’ve had discussions on how much to save and where to invest/donate, how much to spend on a house/car etc, but not one time where we went to bed mad over money. I’m likely the outlier but to say people are F***** liars if they don’t is not accurate.
As much as you say Ramsey puts the clamps on a relationship, I found the opposite to be true, that it actually gave us a sense of freedom as we eliminated debt and built emergency funds and were able to give to help others.
Your point about the football game and girls trip - if you don’t have $1,000 saved for an emergency fund you’re broke and shouldn’t be doing those things anyway.
I always looked at as money is the top cause of divorce and unhappiness in marriage and so it was one of the first things we got on the same page about. Eliminate the big pain points early.
Ramsey Fan I see. Good for you! I am glad it works for you and you never fight and have the perfect life
Lol - not the perfect life! But we don’t fight about money.
Daycare is expensive for sure.
I understand you probably dont want to get personal, but if you posted a snapshot of your financial situation it might help with advice.
My wife and I have argued about money but it hasnt been bad and we havent had an argument in awhile. The biggest hurdle was her background and not having a single idea or any education about finances. Just kept chipping away and trying to help her while having uncompromising standards and then giving her decisions.
A big thing we always try to do with money discussions is point out beforehand and during how blessed we really are. FFS we live so much better than families used to. We have a ton of blessings and it helps to focus on those.
Had a recent victory when my wife was more financially conservative than I was regarding a major expense. It was awesome!
Statistically, the poorer somebody is, the more likely they are to have children. Why is that? It is because they are bored, ignorant, they lack meaning, a child might make them feel important. All 1st world societies are having fewer children because many of the younger generations got screwed over by divorce, abuse, drugs, alcohol from their parents generation, and because it is relatively easy to find a fulfilling career or entertainment in bounds. I loved having and raising children but the task should be a communicated desire between the couple and not a obligation or reaction or boredom or lack of hope. So if people shouldn't have to have children, then why do they need to "take some responsibility". Our country offers freedom and liberty and you get compensated for your service to society, hopefully. Many people just don't need to make a lot of money, waste a ton of resources living on an acre of land, driving their F150, and have four kids who use up 10x the resources of a human on another continent. In fact, the younger generations probably have an instinctual understanding that they won't get the massive amount of resources the last two generations enjoyed, precisely because the last two or three generations were so selfish and wasteful.
Same here. We fight, but its typically over stuff that's not money related...directly or indirectly.
I don't know what world you guys live in.
The PROBLEM i see with most women and men is they're fcking spoiled. If you take care of your money, your money will take care of you.
If I gave you a specific rundown of our budget, most of you would either laugh or cry. It's not that hard.
I don't drink, but I know we both like the ponies, you're one of the guys on here I'd like to have a cup of coffee with sometime.
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