JEFF FOXWORTHY'S COMMENTS ABOUT NEBRASKA
If you buy a TV that doesn't fit in your car, and the man in the van just parking next to you, says, "Just put it in the back of my van, I have to pick up a few things and then I'll drop it off. What is your address?" And about a half hour later, the van pulls into the driveway, the man helps you get the large box in the house, refuses any form of payment, except "Thank You!", drives away and you still don't even know his name, then you live in Nebraska.
If your local Dairy Queen is closed from September through May, you live in Nebraska.
If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don't work there, you live in Nebraska.
If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you live in Nebraska.
If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you live in Nebraska.
If "Vacation" means going anywhere east of York for the weekend, you live in Nebraska.
If you measure distance in squares of farm land, you live in Nebraska.
If you know several people who have hit a cow more than once, you live in Nebraska.
If you have gone from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day and back again, you live in Nebraska.
If you can drive 75 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching, you live in Nebraska.
If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both doors unlocked, you live in Nebraska.
If you carry jumper cables in your car and your wife knows how to use them, you live in Nebraska.
If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit, you live in Nebraska.
If the I-80 speed limit is 75 mph -- you're going 90 and everybody is passing you, you live in Nebraska.
If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow, you live in Nebraska.
If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction, you live in Nebraska.
If you have more hours on your snow blower than miles on your car, you live in Nebraska.
If you find 10 degrees "a little chilly", you live in Nebraska.
so many hit the nail on the head lmao
If you buy a TV that doesn't fit in your car, and the man in the van just parking next to you, says, "Just put it in the back of my van, I have to pick up a few things and then I'll drop it off. What is your address?" And about a half hour later, the van pulls into the driveway, the man helps you get the large box in the house, refuses any form of payment, except "Thank You!", drives away and you still don't even know his name, then you live in Nebraska.
If your local Dairy Queen is closed from September through May, you live in Nebraska.
If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don't work there, you live in Nebraska.
If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you live in Nebraska.
If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you live in Nebraska.
If "Vacation" means going anywhere east of York for the weekend, you live in Nebraska.
If you measure distance in squares of farm land, you live in Nebraska.
If you know several people who have hit a cow more than once, you live in Nebraska.
If you have gone from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day and back again, you live in Nebraska.
If you can drive 75 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching, you live in Nebraska.
If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both doors unlocked, you live in Nebraska.
If you carry jumper cables in your car and your wife knows how to use them, you live in Nebraska.
If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit, you live in Nebraska.
If the I-80 speed limit is 75 mph -- you're going 90 and everybody is passing you, you live in Nebraska.
If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow, you live in Nebraska.
If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction, you live in Nebraska.
If you have more hours on your snow blower than miles on your car, you live in Nebraska.
If you find 10 degrees "a little chilly", you live in Nebraska.
so many hit the nail on the head lmao
